It has been a really really hard few days but I am feeling better tonight. Jack looked so great today, feisty and chubby, and he more than anything was what made me get it together a little. He just looked so sweet and not sick, I can't even explain it. He actually was so full of energy he pulled his breathing tube out last night.... not good. So he was totally pinned down today, poor guy.
We are ready for this. They may transer him down today (Monday) and PJ and I are both hoping that's what happens - the waiting only prolongs the torture. Right now the thing that is really the most upsetting are the 'ideas' the doctors have been throwing around about what might be wrong with Jack. I won't even write them out here because it's too scary to me and I feel that it will somehow make them true, but they are terrible diseases, life long debilitating problems. I have forced myself to not look them up online because i know I will not only convince myself that he has them, but it will then absolutely send me over the edge.
Thank you again - I realize more than ever how truly blessed we are with all the support and love we have. Jack has so many people who love him, it is amazing.
I'll end with, of course, baby pictures. Today is the babies 1 month birthday. I took some pics of the girls - unfortunately, they didn't want to wake up for them, but I tried. Every month I want to take photos of them with these bears. Jack will hopefully be home, healthy and smiling in next month's.
Katie in Blue, Charlotte in Pink:
Tired out from all the picture taking:
14 comments:
If there is one thing I learned during Camden's time in the NICU, it is to take what the doctors say with a grain of salt. They keep you VERY informed, which is great, but sometimes being informed about possible problems isn't really the best thing. Particularly when, often, it turns out to be nothing of the sort.
We had some very dire prognosis with Camden, and he actually died at one point. When he turned a corner, he just plain did. He never looked back, despite all of the doom and gloom we'd been told. I have heard so many of the same stories from others as well.
Hang in there.
We're thinking about you all Megan and sending tons of prayers Jack's way. If you need anything at all please call me... and tell your mom to do the same. ((huge hugs))
-Liz (&Matt)
Your family is in my prayers. Let me know if you need anything.
Sandy (sandykins)
Megan, Please know that I'm thinking of you and PJ. I can't imagine what your going through but please know that we are all with you in spirit and praying that Jack will be home, safe and sound beside his sisters soon.
As always, if there is anything that I can do, Please let me know.
Regina
I just wanted to say that I'm still praying for all of you. I've spread your blog to all that I know, so prayers are coming in from all corners of the world.
Doctors sometimes forget that us lay-folk can look just about anything up on the internet and immediately go to "worse case scenario". (I have this bump on my face... it must be cancer! Nope just acne.) :) Don't look anything up, if you can.
Focus your energy, instead, on your little boy. You are doing the best you can and giving him the best opportunity to thrive. I know you are tired from the stress but close your mind to all of the dark imaginings. Lean on those around you (physically and from cyber-space!) for support.
Everything will be okay and you want to know the cool thing about faith? In those times where our faith seems to be so shaky that it can't support hope, there are others around that will hold you up until faith and hope returns. That's called love and know that you are surrounded by it.
Godspeed.
Megan,
I know all to well that doctors in the NICU scare the crap out of you! I was told that Kieran would have ireverisible brain damage and that he would have many life long complications. And besides his speech, he is a perfect 15 month old little man. And Jack will be too. He is an amazingly strong little boy and he will be okay.
just keep repeating this and I wish you peace!
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change; the courage to change the things i can;and the wisdom to know the difference.
Kristen8/16/03
Just wanted to say that you continue to remain in my thoughts and prayers. Everything will work out fine and Jack will be home soon!
I can't get over how much the babies have changed in 1 month. Love looking at all the pics ... esp. the ones of Jack, he makes my heart melt.
Stay strong and positive!
-- Dana
(blackbeltbride)
As always Megan, please let me know if there is anything I can do.. I'm not working these days, so I'd love to help you and PJ anyway I can..
I'll email you with my cell- please use it! :-)
-Gillian (GilliMax)
I have been thinking about you, and catching up on your blog when I can. You, PJ and Jack are in my prayers.
Staci (amarriedbttrfli)
Megan, Frank and I have been praying hard for you guys. Know that you are in our thoughts. I'm around, so again, please let me know if there's anything I can do...
And I know others have said the same, but I'll concur...CHOP is an EXCELLENT hospital. Jack is in great hands.
The pics of the girls are fantastic! Can't wait until their brother joins them for next month's photos.
melissa & frank
Jack continues to be in my prayers. I added him to the prayer list at church - multiplying the power of prayer and faith.
Hang in there, and take support when you need it.
Nestie Olderwiserbride
- Carol
Megan
I just wanted to let you know that Matt and I have Jack in our prayers. I hope that he'll be down in Philly soon and that they'll be able to get him to turn that corner. If there is anything I can do, please let me know.
---Rachel (raesue from The Nest)
The only thing I can wish for you at this point is strength. This will be a huge test of your strength as a Mom, Wife, Daughter... You are a fighter, just like Jack. Be knowledgeable, advocate for your child. Be the loudest voice that your child can have.
If there's anything that you need, please don't hesitate to reach out. We're rooting for all of you...
YOU CAN DO THIS.
Megan - we are still thinking of you & praying for your family. You know we aren't far...if there is anything either Alex or I can do..just let us know and we will try to help out - I know your family will be around..but if anything needs to be done that we can help with..please don't hesitate to ask.
- Patrizia (atsbride) & Alex
Post a Comment