Sunday, October 26, 2008

Hearty

We are all home, and Katie is wonderful, thank you so much for all the kind words, prayers, thoughts, everything. Sorry it's taken me so long to update, I think I am still recuperating - much more than Katie!

The procedure went perfectly. The amplatzer device was put in to close the PDA, and the balloon catheterization was done to try and widen the valve that was too narrow. We won't know for sure how well that worked for a month or so, but so far it looked good. When we left the hospital the doctor said her murmur was already sounding much better which is a really good sign.

I don't think it's quite sunk in yet that it's DONE. Katie will still have to see her cardiologist every six months, probably until she's well into her teens, just to keep an eye on the valve, but that is no problem (actually if you knew her dreamy cardiologist, it's actually something I look forward to...lol). The surgeon said worst case scenario is that she might need the procedure done again in her early teens. It's like this HUGE HUGE weight has been lifted off our shoulders.

Katie is a big healthy baby. Every single nurse mentioned it, said how nice it was to see such a chubby, healthy looking baby (I actually started to get a little offended for her at all the people calling her fat! :). When babies have what Katie had, they don't usually look like she does. They aren't 24 pounds and rosy cheeked at a year old, they're underweight, small, pale, maybe even blue-ish. I don't think even the doctor is sure why she wasn't affected more by the heart defects. The right side of her heart was enlarged, but it wasn't terrible. They went into the surgery expecting the pressure in the heart to be higher than it was. It's like since she was diagnosed in December, all the bad things that should have happened didn't.

She definitely had a very special guardian angel looking out for her.

The whole thing put so much in perspective for me. It could have been so so much worse. Spending the night in a Pediatric Intensive Care unit shows you what a sick kid really is. It was a terrible night, I sat up in the bedside chair all night with Katie sleeping on me, listening to these poor kids coughing, hacking, crying, calling out for their nurses, for their moms. I held my baby and thanked God we were going home the next day, realized how truly lucky we are.

Realized that at least Jack was spared that. I still second guess everything we did with Jack constantly. Did we give up on him, did we not fight hard enough for him, did we do the right thing. I knew that night, at least he's been spared all the pain. I still would give anything to have Jack here, but not if it meant a lifetime of hospitals and pain and procedures and needles and endless nights of suffering. To be a three month old in the NICU is absolutely heartbreaking... to be a three year old in the ICU, scared, missing your mom, to be a thirteen year old, knowing how sick you are, that may be a whole other level of heartbreaking.

Katie acts like nothing ever happened, she has two small wounds on her groin that she doesn't even seem to know are there. She's her happy, lovable self. I am sloooowly catching up on sleep and feeling better. Honestly, Charlotte seems the most traumatized by the whole thing. She missed Mom and Dad and ESPECIALLY Katie. Poor LaLa!


Katie home Friday night with her monkey Grandma bought her. And Charlotte laying on her - so happy she's home!!

We are grateful and blessed and relieved. I feel like we're slowly climbing out from under this huge mound of worry and stress, after months and months. There's still a few more hurdles to clear but like I wrote before, it's one step at a time.

Eating cookies at Calandra's today with LaLa - all recuperated!

29 comments:

Christa said...

So glad everything went so well. Poor Charlotte..she was probably wondering where the heck her sis went! Love those pajamas they are wearing in the pics...

Christi said...

The girls are getting so big, they are gorgeous. I'm so glad everything went well....

tbonegrl said...

I am so glad it went well. Happy belated birthday to the girls, congrats on the beautiful golf outing for Jack, and the prayers keep coming for you and your family.

leona said...

I'm glad everything went so well!

Millicent said...

I am glad things went so well! It sounds like this vsit to the hospital was sort of like coming full circle in a way. I am glad you are feeling more peaceful. I hope things only continue to improve.

Maybe, just maybe it was Jack's way of saying, "Mama have faith". In your last post you said how you were struggling to have any. Now things have turned out as best they ever could for Katie. I think it is a sign. (((hugs)))

Star said...

In regards to Jack, I just wrote a similar blog about my husband's death and did I do the right thing.

I'm so glad Katie is doing well.

Our life is a bowl of Barry's said...

Happy to know everything went so well and Katie seems to not even know!! Did she miss Charlotte as much as Charlotte missed her? Hope the next week is better than the last..it has to be!

Amanda said...

I'm thrilled to hear that Katie's doing well!
And as for Jack, you did the right thing. I understand and wonder sometimes, too, if we 'gave up' too soon, but then I see sick, suffering children and know that there are some things worse than not having him here.

Beth & Steven said...

So glad to hear that all went well! The girls are PRECIOUS... so cute how much they love each other at such a young age!!! :)

Sara said...

I am so glad to hear everything went fine. I love the pic where she is laying on her sister. So sweet!!

Jody said...

Such wonderful news! I love the pictures. They really are such big, healthy, happy girls!

BreezieGirl said...

Happy to hear that everything went so well!! Hope you all continue to recover well!

Anonymous said...

I am so thrilled everything went well. I love the pictures.

Jessica DiBiasi

Anonymous said...

So glad Katie (and all of you) made it through the proceedure so well!

Katie M said...

It's great to see Katie so happy and healthy!!

rachael said...

i am so happy to hear that everything went well and katie is home again!

Rebecca Nixie said...

Glad to hear things went so well!! Keep your head up and each hurdle will be easier than the last. (((hugs))) to you all.

Lani said...

I'm so happy for your family that every went so smoothly!! What a wonderful thing to have that obstacle behind you now. Keep doing the wonderful job you are doing!

Rachel said...

I'm so glad to hear that everything went well. I know that Jack was looking over Katie and looks over Charlotte as well. You are amazing.

Krista said...

I'm glad to hear Katie made it through her procedure and is feeling so well. Kids are amazing in their ability to rebound from not feeling well. I'm sure Jack had something to do with it too.

Sarah said...

Shwew! (that's me exhaling)
I am so glad things went so well.

Anonymous said...

God Bless all of you.

Abbie said...

I am so glad Katie made it through safely! I was praying for her! Jack was definitely watching out with her! He has an "in" with the Big Guy up there! :)

A Mom in Jacksonville, FL said...

HOORAY! So happy for your family that things went wonderfully for Katie. Pics of the girls are cute, as always. :)

Gwen said...

Oh, Megan, I'm so glad that things went well, I've been thinking of you and Katie, waiting for the update. Happy belated birthday to the girls, they're gorgeous and getting so big. So glad for you all that this is behind you. :)

Sugar Mommy said...

So very wonderful to know that she is doing so well! You, as always are in our prayers.

Anonymous said...

Knew Katie was a superstar and going to do fabulous for her procedure! Of course Jack was by her side to make sure everything was alright.

You were very courageous during your time with Jack and should never second guess what happened. I know that's hard - I've had times in my life that I still second guess what choices I've made but slowly time helps the second guessing to go away and you find a way to forgive yourself for something that others never even blamed you for. Hugs!

Anonymous said...

Hooray for Katie! We're so glad she is home, healthy and doing well.

- Jennifer, Evan and family

Anonymous said...

I am so happy to hear Katie is well and back with her sister-sounds like J is watching all of his girls :)

Cristy
CT Nestie