Monday, December 29, 2008

A 100% True Christmas Story

Another Christmas, come and gone. It was not the best, or the easiest holiday but it was still nice. The girls were happy and that's what really matters. We had our family over our house on Christmas Eve (and in turn infected half of them with the TYPHOID, unfortunately...)




and then on Christmas PJ had to work at the firehouse, so the girls and I went to my mom's.




After Christmas dinner at my mom's I took the girls to the firehouse to visit Daddy. On the way home they were both conked out in their car seats, so tired from a long day. I decided even though it was dark I should at least drive through the cemetery and visit Jack. I don't often go to the cemetery. I don't like it. I don't feel Jack is there, I don't like to think about his little body being buried in that ground, but i felt like i owed it to him to go on Christmas.

I felt such huge, huge sadness, thinking about my little boy, and where he is now... thinking about last Christmas, holding him in my arms, having him still here. I was stopped at the light to turn left onto the street where the cemetery is, crying, sobbing, missing my baby, dreading the cemetery....

When everything in the car started going off. All at once. My cellphone started ringing. A toy steering wheel I know I had turned off earlier started making noises..."Vroom! vroom!! We're here! Fill 'er up!" The navigational system that wasn't even on the windshield, was laying on the floor, kept saying "Lost satellite reception...." It scared the hell out of me. And then I said, okay Jack. You're here. I know, you're here. Thank you.

I turned down the street towards the cemetery, and it is a nice little cemetery, no gates to keep you out, no huge mausoleums, and i could see it up ahead, all lit up with little candles and luminaries people had left on their loved ones graves. And just before I reached it, the navigational system went off again. I don't know why. I had no destination set, it wasn't supposed to be sending me anywhere. But it told me to turn left at the next street...

The name of that street is Jackson Place. When we picked out his plot, we saw the street sign right across the way and couldn't believe it... we knew at that moment, it was the right spot.

"Turn left at Jackson Place, then turn left...."

So I did. I didn't go to the grave, though I could see it. I turned left, and headed home, with all three of my babies in the car.


49 comments:

Our life is a bowl of Barry's said...

Jack came at just the right time to bring you peace and courage to carry on. And it sure seems like he knows exactly when you need him. Wishing you a new year filled with more happiness and a peaceful heart.

irongirl said...

Oh you always bring tears to my eyes! You write so beautifully and you make me miss Jack too! I hope your family has a wonderful 2009 and I will continue to keep Jack in my thoughts!

zarabel said...

What a touching story. So glad Jack sent you signs to comfort you.

Anonymous said...

You should never doubt your little boy - he is always with you and he just needed to send you a sign that he is with you all the time. God bless all five of you.
A follower from the east side of New Jersey :)

Kelly said...

wow...I got chills reading this. I think about you & Jack often & I'm glad you had a nice Christmas

Kelly
(irish1114 from the nest)

Katie said...

I'd been hoping and praying for Jack to show you a nice sign this Christmas, maybe even give you a dream about him, but this, this just tops that! What a truly amazing story, gave me chills!

Michelle and Gary said...

Wow-- I have chills all over my body! Jack is with you all everyday, but I think it is so special that he really let you know that he was with you on Christmas. What an angel!
Many thoughts and prayers for 2009!

Mandy said...

I always get teary when I read your blog, and I apologize for lurking and not posting more, but being a new mom myself it makes me so sad to think about how much you must miss Jack, and I'm usually at a loss for words. It is amazing how he lets you know he is there right when you need him most. I hope you have a wonderful 2009 with your family!

Lisa said...

Oh...

Merry Christmas to Jack and others!

Anonymous said...

Beautiful. He was there with all of you, just like he always is.
Thank you for sharing your stories with us. I follow your blog but often don't post. Just know many people think of you and your family.

Kim from Philadelphia

Rachel said...

Yeah, Jack is with you. He loves you and watches over your family. I truly believe that. I am glad that you are all feeling better. I hope that 2009 is a great year for you and yours!

Elizabeth said...

This sent shivers down my back. He knew when you needed him, huh? That's so special.

Happy holidays!

Franco*Filly (Jess) said...

Wow, that gave me shivers, Megan. On a funny note, I know that toy VROOM VROOM we're here. I HATE IT!
But I think that Jack definitely watches over you guys. He knew you were there....hugs to you guys.

mandy1391 said...

Hi there. I've been reading your blog for sometime now, but I've never left a comment. I wanted to come out of "lurking" to tell you that your blog always touches my heart. I think of Jack often. He was blessed with a wonderful Mommy, and it is so clear that he is still with you and always will be. May the new year bring you much joy and love.

Erica said...

wow! Jack was really there with you. what a beautiful story. I think of Jack very often. Hugs for you Megan.

Anonymous said...

That totally made my cry and gave me such chills!!! I'm so glad that Jack sent you Merry Christmas signs!

-Loren

Emily said...

Oh Megan! What a wonderful post. I am so happy Jack came to you on Christmas. He is always there, he just knows when you need a gentle (or blaring) reminder.
Happy Holidays...

rachael said...

that gave me goosebumps...holy cow, what a story megan! so touching, so jack.

Kristin (kekis) said...

Oh wow. What a wonderful Christmas blessing Jack brought to you.

KK said...

What a beautiful story! Jack is always here with you and C and K!!

Linda said...

What an amazing story Megan. It's incredible the things that happen when Jack sends you messages.

Parcells Custom Painting said...

Jack is an amazing soul, I'm so glad he is able to send you signs to remind you that he is always with you. I've been thinking about you a lot Megan. My prayers are with you always, but especially this week. xo

Li'l Foot's mommy said...

Wow, how beautiful is this little Christmas story. Even better that you ahve a place to write it down and remember it and reread it for years to come. You are so blessed.

Christa said...

Wow Megan..I don't even know what to say except that I have chills from head to toe! What an incredible story...I love when you share how he reminds you that he is always there. I always share your stories with my husband, too...Jack touches so many people!

Justin said...

You are brilliant in all ways. And i'm very sorry for Jack. I pray for him every night before I go to sleep so that maybe he can be at peace for the night. I spend alot of time reading your blog and it's opened my locked heart. When my neighbor moved away to milford and my cat mondo died I couldn't even feel the beat of my heart anymore. So thanks please email me at kksolidsnake9@gmail.com I wish to be your friend.

hopeful #1 said...

Thank you so much for sharing this story. I pray for you guys all the time and I too am a lurker more than I am a poster. After reading this I have chills all over my body and tears in my eyes.

Jack, What a little ray of sunshine you are for your mommy! Thank you for keeping her calm and safe while she stopped by your grave. She misses you so very much and we all pray that you will continue to comfort her.

Have a Happy New Year, we're thinking of you.

Tracey said...

Wow, that is such a powerful story! I have been praying for you and Jack all week knowing how hard this week would be for you. I hope Jack's sign to you has given your heart some much deserved peace. I know how much you ache to hold your little boy in your arms, but I truly believe he knows you and so many of us are holding him in our hearts. I wish you nothing but peace and good things!

Anonymous said...

What an AWESOME story! Sometimes I guess we just need earthly reminders that those we love are with us always!

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

That gave me the chills.

Marie said...

awww you always make me tear up. so glad he sent you signals to know he was with you. hope you have a happy new year

Anonymous said...

Megan, I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking so much about your family this week, and especially about Jack. I pray that your pain is eased, and that you, PJ and the girls all find comfort in each other. All the best- MyBlueHeaven (nj nestie)

Anonymous said...

I knew Jack would be there.......He's never going to leave you or his beautiful sisters..take comfort in that..He's such a good boy!!

A Mom in Jacksonville, FL said...

What an amazing story...I had goose bumps as I read it.

Your girls are beautiful, as always. Glad that Jack gave you all a special reminder that he IS with you.

HUGS!

jennmichael said...

That is such an amazing story. I have chills, goose bumps, watery eyes. Wow.
ps. I was reading nursery rhymes to my son today and one of them was "Jack sprat could eat no fat...." and I thought of you and your little Jack.
Blessings to you and your family in 2009.

Anonymous said...

My family is thinking of Jack tonight. We never met him but we do love and think of him often. Jack has taught us so much about love and family...something we will forever be grateful for.
Love,
Tara
njbride2000t

Amy (MyColonyNJ) said...

I am totally crying while reading this. Thank you so much for sharing.

Jack will always be with you

Gillian said...

What an amazing story, although it doesn't surprise me that Jack let you know he was there. :-) He is always with you, the girls and PJ.

I think of Jack often, and have thought of you all so much during the holidays, and especially this week. Much love and many hugs!!

Anonymous said...

Megan, Just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and Jack tomorrow. Your sweet boy is in my prayers. Hugs to you.

Anonymous said...

Meagan-
I will think of your sweet family tomorrow. Happy New Year. I hope it brings you a lot peace and comfort.
Lori

Anonymous said...

Like others have said, Jack is always with you...your post made me tear up and gave me chills...I know he was sending you a sign! I always think about you and your family...and hope that you have a peaceful and healthy new year!

Shannonkm7 said...

Love this story Megan! You know that Jack is always with you and leave it to him to show you in such a strong way for Christmas. You have been in my thoughts constantly this past week. I know this is a tough time for you, but you are stronger than anyone I know.
Lots of hugs and prayers!
Shannon

Trish (triciabell) said...

Thinking of you always, but especially this time of year. It makes me smile, thinking of Jack riding in that car with you. He's so precious. ((HUGS)) to all of you.

MrsAmandaMqn said...

You have an amazing son, Jack is such an angel to send you sweetness when you needed it. I hope 2009 brings peace and happiness to you and your loved ones.

Amy (MyColonyNJ) said...

I am thinking of you and your family today.

{{{HUGS}}

Karalyn said...

Thinking of you and your sweet Angel Jack today.
Your family is in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

What an amazing sign from your little boy. Brought me to tears-of sadness and joy that he was with you. ((HUGS))
danielle

JackiJaguar said...

And now I'm in tears, too. What a nice way for Jack to let you know that you didn't have to go to the cemetary to be with him.

tbonegrl said...

Made me cry. He is with you always, Megan.

MeghatronsMom said...

That was such an amazing story. Just like others, I cried. Jack is always with you & knows how to make his mommy's heart better. Much love