A big topic with the girls lately is how we are all related to each other. Katie especially loves to talk about this…. that Grandma Kathy is Mommy’s Mom, and Uncle Brad is my brother and Aunt Megan is Daddy’s sister. She doesn’t always remember it all but she tries and she always does remember that her Mommy is Megan, her Daddy is PJ, her sister is Lala and her brother is Baby Jack.
The problem has always been, how to talk about Jack with them. How to get them to understand ‘where’ he is and why he isn’t physically here, when honestly I’m not sure the answer to either of those questions myself. How to make him real to them, make him real as their brother and not just some picture on the shelf. A little while ago I started telling them this story, and now they ask for it almost every day. I show them pictures of me when I was pregnant, and point out where they each were in my belly, and it’s known as ‘The story of the babies in Mommy’s big tummy…..’
A long time ago, Mommy had three babies in her belly. Baby Charlotte, Baby Katie, and Baby Jack. And they were all really happy in Mommy’s tummy, they had big bubbles of water to swim in and their only job was to grow and grow as big as they could. They floated around in their bubbles and waved to each other, and laughed and kicked and held hands and loved being all together.
Then one day the doctors decided it was time for the babies to come out. First came Baby Charlotte, then Baby Katie, then Baby Jack. And they were all still really really small, they were the smallest babies Mommy had ever seen. So they had to stay in the hospital for a little while to get bigger and stronger and learn how to do things babies do, like breathe and eat and sleep and cry.
Baby Katie and Baby Charlotte did just that – every day they got bigger and pretty soon they were able to come home and live with Mommy and Daddy and their cat Leroy. But even though Baby Jack tried as hard as he could to get bigger and stronger, and the doctors tried as hard as they could to help him, he was just too little and too tired. So instead of coming home with Mommy and Daddy, he got to go live in Heaven with the sun and the moon and the clouds and all the beautiful stars.
And Baby Jack is still up there watching over his family, and especially his sisters Katie and Charlotte who he loves so much. And every time you see a butterfly or a rainbow or a twinkly star, that’s Jack saying hello to you and telling you, remember when we were all in Mommy’s tummy together? Because I do.
39 comments:
Crying, of course. We tell a story very similar before bed every night. As nice as it is to know that my survivors will help to keep their sister's memory alive I wish things were much different.
That was absolutely perfect.
This brought tears to my eyes. I agree with Nancy R. That is perfect!
beautiful, megan. :)
Oh, Megan... Beautiful and perfect.
Your story brought tears to my eyes. I couldn't think of a more perfect way to tell the girls the story of Jack.
I have been following your blog for sometime, but have never commented. Your strength is amazing, recently I suffered a loss, and seeing that others can get through it, helps tremendously. Thank you for sharing!
That's beautiful. Just beautiful.
Perfect story!
That is just a beautiful story, Megan. I am crying reading this.
We struggle with how to explain Abbey to the girls. They want to know why she can't come over to play with them. :(
Someday they'll be old enough to understand and they'll appreciate that you have shared their brother with them their entire lives.
Megan, all 3 of your babies are so lucky to have you as their mom.
Wow, fighting back the tears! I don't think I could have explained it any better. I've also wondered how I'm going to explain this to my girls when they get old enough. Tell me that it does eventually get easier please?
That's a beautiful, really perfect.
So sweet!
Therese
Oh Megan, this story is so sweet it brought tears to my eyes. It is perfect.
Absolutely beautiful!
Megan, Jack, LaLa and Katie are so lucky to have such an eloquent Mom. Beautiful.
Indescribably beautiful. I'm so glad they have such an amazing mommy to share that story and Jack with them
Wow! What a beautiful tribute to your sweet son. I too have an angel son and he has a surviving twin sister. I completely relate to you when you say how you try to make your son real to them other than just a picture they look at. It's definitely something we strive for in our family but sometimes it really sucks that this is what you have to do. I seriously haven't stopped crying for 5 minutes after reading this. I have never commented before either but you truly are a sweet amazing mother and I really admire you for all you do to remember Jack. Your girls are so freaking adorable, I have enjoyed reading about them and "watching" them grow up as well. Thanks for sharing that story, I will never forget it. Much love to your sweet Jack.
Beautiful story!!
Wow. Moved completely to tears. What a beautiful way for your girls to remember Jack.
That is so sweet!
That is a beautiful story. Amazing.
Absolutely perfect story for all of your babies. I've been a longtime follower of your blog and have always admired your strength. You are a wonderful mother to ALL of your children. God bless you and your family.
Oh, Megan <3
beautiful, and now I'm a mess. God Bless you Megan, I don't know how you have the beautiful strength that you do!
That is a perfect, beautiful story to explain to them to keep Jack forever in their thoughts.
Wow, very impressive.
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Brought tears to my eyes. Just perfect and beautiful.
That was beautiful!
What a great little story!! It's perfect...and the picture is breath taking!!
Oh Megan, this is beautiful. I love that story so much, I may steal a version of it for my kids when they get a little older. You're an amazing mommy.
That was so beautiful. It made me tear up....
That really is perfect...I always have wanted to say something but never have had the right words. You said it so sweetly and tenderly from a Mom's heart! They are cute girls and have grown-up too fast :) Happy 3rd Birthday girls too!! :)
Beautiful and perfect - just like your three babies. (((HUGS)))
Megan...I am crying as I type this. The way you told them their birth story is so beautiful. Julia and I check in to read your blog and she loves to see pictures of the girls and we always say a special prayer and hello to Jack. You are an amazing writer and Mother.
Megan, first of all, Happy 3rd birthday to your children. Just wanted to thank you for this. My kids will turn 3 in December, and their triplet was lost before they were born. Thank you for the story. I am crying, but I am so glad I came back to read this a second time. I still read your blog even though I never post on the nest anymore.
xo
Mrs. Finny
SO perfect - you are an amazing mommy! Beautiful story for your girls about there amazing brother Jack!
I see why your girls ask for the story. Beautiful.
Awww, it's upsetting seeing people losing babies... I hope they can continue without Jack... :'-(
(I'm 5 years late, BUT STILL!!!!)
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